Wanted: Silence

Midnight. I watch the flickering shadows on my ceiling, cast by the cars passing by way, way below. I block out their honking, the silence in my head helps keeps my illusion of being isolated.

I’m in a bubble. Transparent, fragile and light. Then again, maybe I am the bubble – could I float otherwise?

Fly away. I fly away past all the roof tops and clouds.

Far away from any signs of life I’d recognize.

It’s not enough.

I’m gliding down a river, the trickling of the water lulling me into a false sense of security. I am the stream now, taking with me all that stands in my way, determined in my path towards my destination. I flow where ever I can, take whatever shall move. I am powerful, and free, and rapid.

I need more.

I walk along the woods, hearing and seeing nothing but the path in front of me. I walk, and walk, and walk. I observe the fallen leaves, the stones and insect life so different from my own. I walk until I reach the end of the woods, till my feet cry from exhaustion, till there is no where else to go. I am tired – but my mind is still restless.

Something is missing.

I open my eyes and watch the shadows dance above. The noises trickle back into my consciousness and I grit my teeth. The blaring horn of the bus. The screech of the car tires. The rev of the motorcycle… No, no, no. This will not do.

I am the storm. Forceful, fearful, fast and consuming. I destroy everything in my path, I have no mercy. Bow to me, bow to my authority. A casual flicker of my eye could change the world as it stands today.

Horn.

Dancing light. Is that what I’m reduced to? What I’m forced to endure?

I sit alone. There is no one, no time, no sound, no light, no feeling. It is a cold place, this darkness, but I can only sense it. I’m in a corner, my legs pressed into my chest, my arms wrapped about my knees.

I cannot see anything, yet I am not frightened. From the depths of my mind strikes a familiar, haunting tune. I cannot place it, yet I’m sure I’ve heard it.

I know every note, every symphony, every tone, every bar, pitch and scale. It fills me, thrills me, chills me and… kills me? I cannot contain it for long. The music peaks… and I no longer am. There is no existence, not anymore. There is nothing.

Nothing and everything.

Five hours later, I wake up cold and alone, curled up on the titled floor of my room.